The Sentinel covered this log house moving day in 1998.

Ancestors, Legends & Time

"Only in America" fun

Jeanne Newby

I found a wonderful message in an old file with items from the turn of the century, 2003. It is titled “Only in America” and I would like to share some of it with you. It is lighthearted and might bring a chuckle or two.

Only in America… are there handicap parking places in front of a skating rink.

Only in America… do drugstores make the sick walk all the way to the back of the store to get their prescriptions while healthy people can buy cigarettes at the front.

Only in America… do people order double cheeseburgers, large fries and a diet coke.

Only in America… do banks leave doors open and then chain pens to the counters.

Only in America… do we leave expensive cars in the driveway and put useless junk in the locked garage.

Only in America… do they have drive-up ATM machines with Braille lettering.

Ever wonder why… you nver see the headline, “Psychic wins lottery?”

Ever wonder why… abbreviated is such a long word?

Why is a doctor’s work called “practice?”

Why is lemon juice made with artificial flavor and dishwashing liquid made with real lemons?

Why is the person who invests all of your money called a broker?

Why is the time of day with the slowest traffic called rush hour?

Why isn’t there mouse-flavored cat food?

When dog food is new-and-improved tasting, who taste tests it?

Why do they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?

Why are they called apartments when they are all stuck together?

Here is a Memory Question

How many of you remember the historic day that the Dawson Cabin rode into Webb City on North Madison Street on its way to a wooded area north of the Webb City Rehabilitation Center? 

The cabin had been moved to the Indian Springs subdivision one log at a time and reconstructed. Then 10 years later, on Jan. 18, 1998, Jack and Nancy Dawson were able to have the entire cabin transported in one piece, including the fireplace and chimney. What a great addition to Webb City. The Dawsons have shared that wonderful piece of history with many people, young and old.

Jeanne’s new book, “The Zinc City, Webb City, Missouri” is now available at Webb City Chamber office and other local retailers, such at Maggie Jane’s Gifts, at 8 S. Main St.

Jeanne Newby

A lot of us appreciate the Bradbury Bishop Fountain, but Jeanne actually worked behind the counter making sodas while she was in high school. She knows everything about Webb City and is a member of the Webb City R-7 School Board.

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